---
product_id: 43950738
title: "Bearing the Unbearable: Love, Loss, and the Heartbreaking Path of Grief"
price: "₩28362"
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reviews_count: 9
url: https://www.desertcart.kr/products/43950738-bearing-the-unbearable-love-loss-and-the-heartbreaking-path-grief
store_origin: KR
region: South Korea
---

# Bearing the Unbearable: Love, Loss, and the Heartbreaking Path of Grief

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Bearing the Unbearable: Love, Loss, and the Heartbreaking Path of Grief [Cacciatore, Dr. Joanne, Rubin, Jeffrey] on desertcart.com. *FREE* shipping on qualifying offers. Bearing the Unbearable: Love, Loss, and the Heartbreaking Path of Grief

Review: A Perfect Gift for the Bereaved - If you ever find yourself wondering what to do for someone who has experienced the death of a child or someone close to them, buy two copies of this book. Give the first copy to the bereaved, and read the other copy to educate yourself on how to comfort your grieving loved one. The cost of the book is a fraction of what it takes to have flowers delivered, and it will do far more good and have a much more lasting impact than any bouquet could offer. Of the many books I have read about grief and loss, this was by far the most helpful. Before I was even halfway finished with this book, I ordered another ten copies to give as gifts. As of this writing, I have four copies left. Writing as someone who facilitates support groups for parents whose children have died and as a bereaved parent, I wholeheartedly recommend this book to anyone who is grieving or who wants to help someone who is. After the deaths of my two oldest sons at the age of 21, the depth of my grief terrified me. I dared not fully surrender to it, afraid of where it might take me and unsure of whether I could ever return to a functional life afterwards. To me, grief was a feeling I suppressed as much as possible, and something I fought like a tiger when I could not escape its clutches. Dr. Cacciatore helped me (in her words) “to understand that monster [grief] isn’t separate from me.” "Bearing the Unbearable" lays bare the process of grief, making it available for inspection and understanding. And seen in the light of day, I found it to be far less frightening. Some writers are great storytellers and some have a poetic way with words; others are masters of their subject matter. Dr. Cacciatore combined all three talents to produce a book that is loving, informative, unflinching, soothing, honest (sometimes brutally so), and uplifting. Although the book is an easy read and I am a voracious reader, I did not finish it in one sitting. I paused frequently to savor Dr. Jo’s words and let them sink into my heart and soul. I then re-read the book with a highlighter at hand, marking some passages that I believed would be valuable in a support group setting, and other sections that seemed to have been written just for me. Chapters 12 and 18, "Intensity and Coping" and "The Practice of Being With", were inspiring to me as a facilitator. "Early Manifestations of Grief", Chapter 4, is the most heavily highlighted chapter in my copy, and it has proved particularly helpful in group with the newly-bereaved. But Chapter 13, "Contraction and Expansion", truly spoke to my soul. It defined for me in hindsight a process that I have experienced time and again since the deaths of my sons. I came to see that my periods of contraction were not evidence of a failure to cope, but were instead a valuable coping mechanism. As she is well-acquainted with grief in its many forms, Dr. Cacciatore’s thoughtful words serve to make bereavement less terrifying. Her unique understanding of grief makes me certain that I can navigate this journey, and relying on "Bearing the Unbearable" gives me confidence that I can help others do it, too. Dr. Cacciatore - Thank you for this book. Harriet Beecher Stowe could have been describing you when she wrote: “There are in this world blessed souls, whose sorrows all spring up into joys for others; whose earthly hopes, laid in the grave with many tears, are the seed from which spring healing flowers and balm for the desolate and the distressed.”
Review: A Must Read Book on Grief, Loss and Living - This special book is a must read for anyone who has experienced loss (all of us), for helping professionals, and for those supporting the bereaved. Dr. Cacciatore has a remarkable way of writing about death and dying in ways that make the journey bearable. Dr. Jo is an expert on traumatic grief, with her own personal experience as well as years of academically researching the subject. She talks about death and dying in straight forward and elegant language with the net effect of allowing the reader into her world and the worlds of others who have borne the unbearable. In our grief phobic culture, where we are pressured to stay forever young, youthful and even death defying, Dr. Jo reminds us that death is inevitable for us all. We have been led to believe the "natural order of things" (that our children outlive us) is sadly a construction of a death phobic culture. Her experience both personally as a Mother and professionally as an expert in the field of grief and loss is the backdrop for this lovely book, which reads like a poem. This life affirming book about death, dying and loss reminds us how significant the present moment is in our lives, and how our need to control even invades the grief process. The book includes 51 brief chapters that introduce us to important topics regarding grief and loss, and to special people who Dr. Jo has helped in her career as a grief therapist. The book reminds us for the need for self care as a pathway through grief. It reminds those of us who are helping professionals for our own self care as a way to provide effective care for others. It reminds me to listen deeply to my clients who rail and cry over their losses, deeply listen, rather than cut off their stories to share with them whatever "intervention" I believe will help their suffering. In fact, Dr. Jo reminds us that it is the telling of the story of the lost beloved which is perhaps the most healing part of therapeutic treatment - the opportunity to deeply listen, to immerse myself in the suffering of my client with them. We learn in this book that grief cannot be circumvented. We must immerse ourselves in it to fully experience it. Inhabit the grief; listen to the grief; learn from our grief and loss. And perhaps, but without guarantee, we may someday be able to make meaning out of our unbearable losses following kindness, care and attention to ourselves and our grief. In this medicalized culture where we are encouraged to take a pill (or twenty) to shove away our feelings and numb ourselves to the experiences of life (both good and bad) it seems a radical approach. Having personally witnessed the effect that deep listening can provide to a bereaved person, I am convinced that this is the only way. Thank you, Dr. Cacciatore, for this important work. I hand it out to all of my clients, and have given copies to family and friends. I highly recommend it to all who hope to help those who cry for their beloved family members, gone all too soon.

## Technical Specifications

| Specification | Value |
|---------------|-------|
| Best Sellers Rank | #7,015 in Books ( See Top 100 in Books ) #20 in Love & Loss #22 in Grief & Bereavement #336 in Parenting & Relationships (Books) |
| Customer Reviews | 4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars (2,209) |
| Dimensions  | 6 x 0.7 x 9 inches |
| Edition  | 1st |
| ISBN-10  | 1614292965 |
| ISBN-13  | 978-1614292968 |
| Item Weight  | 2.31 pounds |
| Language  | English |
| Print length  | 248 pages |
| Publication date  | June 27, 2017 |
| Publisher  | Wisdom Publications |

## Images

![Bearing the Unbearable: Love, Loss, and the Heartbreaking Path of Grief - Image 1](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/61JhGn2b8DL.jpg)

## Customer Reviews

### ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ A Perfect Gift for the Bereaved
*by M***Z on October 9, 2017*

If you ever find yourself wondering what to do for someone who has experienced the death of a child or someone close to them, buy two copies of this book. Give the first copy to the bereaved, and read the other copy to educate yourself on how to comfort your grieving loved one. The cost of the book is a fraction of what it takes to have flowers delivered, and it will do far more good and have a much more lasting impact than any bouquet could offer. Of the many books I have read about grief and loss, this was by far the most helpful. Before I was even halfway finished with this book, I ordered another ten copies to give as gifts. As of this writing, I have four copies left. Writing as someone who facilitates support groups for parents whose children have died and as a bereaved parent, I wholeheartedly recommend this book to anyone who is grieving or who wants to help someone who is. After the deaths of my two oldest sons at the age of 21, the depth of my grief terrified me. I dared not fully surrender to it, afraid of where it might take me and unsure of whether I could ever return to a functional life afterwards. To me, grief was a feeling I suppressed as much as possible, and something I fought like a tiger when I could not escape its clutches. Dr. Cacciatore helped me (in her words) “to understand that monster [grief] isn’t separate from me.” "Bearing the Unbearable" lays bare the process of grief, making it available for inspection and understanding. And seen in the light of day, I found it to be far less frightening. Some writers are great storytellers and some have a poetic way with words; others are masters of their subject matter. Dr. Cacciatore combined all three talents to produce a book that is loving, informative, unflinching, soothing, honest (sometimes brutally so), and uplifting. Although the book is an easy read and I am a voracious reader, I did not finish it in one sitting. I paused frequently to savor Dr. Jo’s words and let them sink into my heart and soul. I then re-read the book with a highlighter at hand, marking some passages that I believed would be valuable in a support group setting, and other sections that seemed to have been written just for me. Chapters 12 and 18, "Intensity and Coping" and "The Practice of Being With", were inspiring to me as a facilitator. "Early Manifestations of Grief", Chapter 4, is the most heavily highlighted chapter in my copy, and it has proved particularly helpful in group with the newly-bereaved. But Chapter 13, "Contraction and Expansion", truly spoke to my soul. It defined for me in hindsight a process that I have experienced time and again since the deaths of my sons. I came to see that my periods of contraction were not evidence of a failure to cope, but were instead a valuable coping mechanism. As she is well-acquainted with grief in its many forms, Dr. Cacciatore’s thoughtful words serve to make bereavement less terrifying. Her unique understanding of grief makes me certain that I can navigate this journey, and relying on "Bearing the Unbearable" gives me confidence that I can help others do it, too. Dr. Cacciatore - Thank you for this book. Harriet Beecher Stowe could have been describing you when she wrote: “There are in this world blessed souls, whose sorrows all spring up into joys for others; whose earthly hopes, laid in the grave with many tears, are the seed from which spring healing flowers and balm for the desolate and the distressed.”

### ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ A Must Read Book on Grief, Loss and Living
*by L***T on January 1, 2018*

This special book is a must read for anyone who has experienced loss (all of us), for helping professionals, and for those supporting the bereaved. Dr. Cacciatore has a remarkable way of writing about death and dying in ways that make the journey bearable. Dr. Jo is an expert on traumatic grief, with her own personal experience as well as years of academically researching the subject. She talks about death and dying in straight forward and elegant language with the net effect of allowing the reader into her world and the worlds of others who have borne the unbearable. In our grief phobic culture, where we are pressured to stay forever young, youthful and even death defying, Dr. Jo reminds us that death is inevitable for us all. We have been led to believe the "natural order of things" (that our children outlive us) is sadly a construction of a death phobic culture. Her experience both personally as a Mother and professionally as an expert in the field of grief and loss is the backdrop for this lovely book, which reads like a poem. This life affirming book about death, dying and loss reminds us how significant the present moment is in our lives, and how our need to control even invades the grief process. The book includes 51 brief chapters that introduce us to important topics regarding grief and loss, and to special people who Dr. Jo has helped in her career as a grief therapist. The book reminds us for the need for self care as a pathway through grief. It reminds those of us who are helping professionals for our own self care as a way to provide effective care for others. It reminds me to listen deeply to my clients who rail and cry over their losses, deeply listen, rather than cut off their stories to share with them whatever "intervention" I believe will help their suffering. In fact, Dr. Jo reminds us that it is the telling of the story of the lost beloved which is perhaps the most healing part of therapeutic treatment - the opportunity to deeply listen, to immerse myself in the suffering of my client with them. We learn in this book that grief cannot be circumvented. We must immerse ourselves in it to fully experience it. Inhabit the grief; listen to the grief; learn from our grief and loss. And perhaps, but without guarantee, we may someday be able to make meaning out of our unbearable losses following kindness, care and attention to ourselves and our grief. In this medicalized culture where we are encouraged to take a pill (or twenty) to shove away our feelings and numb ourselves to the experiences of life (both good and bad) it seems a radical approach. Having personally witnessed the effect that deep listening can provide to a bereaved person, I am convinced that this is the only way. Thank you, Dr. Cacciatore, for this important work. I hand it out to all of my clients, and have given copies to family and friends. I highly recommend it to all who hope to help those who cry for their beloved family members, gone all too soon.

### ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ even though I had bad days while reading it
*by A***R on March 7, 2018*

I purchased this book one month after my dad died. I needed some clarity about how to handle my grief. It took me another month to open the book, but when I did, I cried, page after page. Soon, though, my eyes dried, my heart opened, and, even though I had bad days while reading it, Dr. Cacciatore's book lifted me up. I realize that grief must be dealt with, but if you accept that grief may be with you forever, if you move forward every day, it will be easier to handle as you get stronger. I understand that the best place for my daddy is with me and those who say "He is in a better place" don't understand how I feel, how I handle my grief. Dr. Cacciatore's book helped me, guided me, taught me more about grief than I could have dreamed. I realized that death affects all people differently and I am lucky to have lost my daddy gently, not in a horrific way. Granted, all loss is horrific, but this book focuses on parents losing children, brothers losing sisters, and children losing parents to murder, violent accidents, and terrible diseases. If you need help understanding your grief, you should purchase this book. It's easy to read, with short, but compelling chapters and it is easy to understand. And no matter how you lose your loved ones, this book will aid you in dealing with your grief and loss.

## Frequently Bought Together

- Bearing the Unbearable: Love, Loss, and the Heartbreaking Path of Grief
- It's OK That You're Not OK: Meeting Grief and Loss in a Culture That Doesn't Understand
- Grieving Is Loving: Compassionate Words for Bearing the Unbearable

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*Store origin: KR*
*Last updated: 2026-01-30*