The Queen's Code Companion: A Guide for Book Clubs

A book to save the soul and save relationships of all kinds. Gives a better understanding of my limiting beliefs and my understanding of men and women. We are truly all trying our best and want to the best for others and this book captures that.

As a man reading this book, it does give a deeper insight into what might be going on from my wife's perspective that I would not have ever come up with on my own. This helps me 1 be more compassionate and understanding when it comes to the misunderstandings as man and woman, and 2 also helps me communicate what my needs are as a man more eloquently instead of what may come off as brutish man speak or what ever. Very very good book for men and women both to read.

What an amazing read. For the consumer who wants insight into relationships without the usual boring self-help rhetoric. This was so eye-opening and interesting, it's the first book I finished and restarted the same night EVER. The first time you read it, you learn so many new things, you want to reread it right away, it's that irresistible, eye-opening, and cleverly written! I look forward to reading more of Alison Armstrong asap.

Great Book! It really gives you a different perspective on men. I took lots of notes and I will definitely be re-reading and getting more books from this author.

From my perspective being male, I found the information presented by Alison in her book The Queens Code to be on point. I don't recall there being anything I found objectional. I loved the way the storyline and the information flowed. In my own life, I have tried to convey some of the same sentiments, definitely not as articulate or concise as Alison presents them here. Three things I truly appreciate about this book: 1. It helped me to clearly understand what I was feeling. 2. It helped me to clarify the ideas I wanted to convey. 3. The Queens code speaks to an issue long plaguing male/female relationships and offered a solution. Take aways: - Building up a man gets the woman what she needs faster and more often than tearing him down. - Emasculating men never motivates them. - Open communication, honesty, and setting expectations are important in any relationship. - Sharing with your partner what you need from them and what it means or provide to you when they do it. I love this book. It is a great read and I have recommended it to whoever I believe will benefit from reading it, male or female. I have even bought copies for my girls, ages 33 and 25. My hope is that when they have completed the book, we can have an open discussion about the concepts presented by Alison.

Shockingly accurate and hit close to home. Just bought this book for my girlfriend (literally trying to save my relationship) and the wife of a friend (trying to save his relationship).

The best form of a self-help book is one that you don't even realize how much knowledge you are taking in. It draws you in unknowingly until you realize you are thinking differently, your reactions are slower, you observe more. The best books have characters that draw you into the story and their life in a way that you connect to them and this book does all of that and more.

This book may have *saved my relationship* within 8 hours of my starting the book, and I'm only 15% of the way through it!! First, let me qualify my background, and why I bought this book: I'm an expert on men. No, really. Oh sure, lots of people may say that, but I actually mean that I am a professional expert on men. No, I'm not a lady of the evening, I'm something much lower than that - I'm a lawyer. In fact, I was one of the very first fathers' rights lawyers in the United States, with a career spanning about 30 years working with single fathers, and a *lot* of that was counselling and coaching them. So, I got, very early on, how men communicate, filter, react, share, bottle up (did I mention react) *much* differently than women, and how the translation that takes place between "she speaks, he hears" and "he speaks, she hears" is *so very vital to understand*! (Oh yeah, I'm also an author of a book on men - and coach about the differences between men and women - specifically for single fathers.) I'm also very familiar with what our society is doing to our boys (and causing our women and girls to do to our boys - have you ever seen the "Boys are stupid, throw rocks at them" products? No? Here you go: Boys Are Stupid Throw Rocks At Them t-shirt Think you could get away with a "girls are stupid, throw rocks at them" product line?) I actually heard about this book from a friend who was basically mocking it. That made me curious, so I came to Amazon to look it up. And, based on my work with men, and advocacy for boys, when I saw *men* posting reviews, saying things like "I have to say that this book blew my mind. Having a feminist mother and growing up in a time when men have been looked down upon for being men, I grew up knowing masculine shame," I knew I had to get it and read it. I have to tell you it was *so* refreshing to read another woman who gets it! And who gets that by trying to make men be like women we are not only doing a disservice to men, and screwing up our boys, but that we are doing a disservice to *ourselves* (women). By *honouring* the differences, it allows men to also honour *our* differences. But much more importantly, in this book Armstrong really explains how what we do to men is causing *us* (again, women) so much frustration, resentment, and anger, and robbing us of the joy *we ourselves* can experience. No, this is *not* a Dr. Laura-esque "wrap yourself in saran wrap and submit to your man" book. Not at all. It's a "understand the differences, and speak to his strengths instead of bitching about his weaknesses - which are often *your* perception of 'weakness', and not really a weakness at all - it's a *difference*" book. (Ok, I feel like I'm getting on a soapbox now...let me climb back down (I'm only 5'3, so I need that soapbox).) What is interesting about this book is that rather than a typical "do this, do that" tome, it's a narrative told in the form of a story. Sure, some of it is a little hokey ("frog farmer"? Really?) but the brilliance of this is that it gets the point across in a way that isn't all "do this, do that" or preachy. So, I got the book last night, and started reading it. I got about 15% of the way through (got the Kindle edition, that's how I know). Then I put out the light and went to sleep. This morning, I had a conversation with TMWMITU (The Most Wonderful Man in the Universe). It was a conversation - about a potentially touchy subject - which could have gone very, *very* wrong. But, as the conversation was unfolding I suddenly remembered the things I'd read last night...and ohmygod...this was *exactly* that sort of situation. So I took a deep breath, and practiced what I'd read just 8 hours earlier. Which blew me away because, in case I haven't mentioned it, I've been working in this field for nearly 30 years. But that's the magic of this book - you read it like a story, and it sticks in your head for when you need it. And guess what? ...TAHDAH! What *could* have been an awful, even relationship-ending conversation, instead went down the path of a *fantastic* conversation, with a wonderful resolution, and me feeling closer to him and happier than ever! (Now, wouldn't you like to feel that way?? If your answer is "no", then I submit that you need this book even more, because you may well be holding on to a lot of resentment, and self-righteous anger.) Because this book is truly right in my own wheelhouse of my expertise, I sincerely invite any of you to drop me a line (click on my name and "see more" to find my email address) and ask me any question that you may have, and that you think I could be helpful in answering.

I rarely review books on Amazon (simply because I never seem to have the time) and I have never followed an author on Amazon. Alison Armstrong and her wise and precious teachings have inspired me to do both. And much more. They have also given me the time to do both. . . Because I am learning how to receive in ways I have never experienced before, and this is giving me much more time to be in my life. Both this, and her preceding book ‘Keys to the Kingdom’ (which needs to be read FIRST), are beyond value. Gentle, practical, inclusive and deeply wise, they give men and women back to themselves by helping us to understand the inherent gifts of our sex and that of the opposite sex, and by teaching us how to navigate the differences and communicate effectively within them. Men have become wise and beautiful beings in my eyes, towering sources of strength and kindness who give deep structure to life; women have become magical and mysterious weavers of beauty and meaning, attending and receiving life in ways that enable its warm and wondrous flourishing. I feel grateful for the wisdom of Alison Armstrong who holds both the masculine and feminine in such regard and delivers so much wisdom with so much kindness and humour. The book is written with true skill and mastery and is utterly enjoyable. Part romance consisting of the stories of three couples of varying ages and degrees of commitment, part practical manual for how relationships can deeply work, and part paean to the wonders of both sexes, it is a book to cherish. If you are open to it, it will open you, your heart, your life.

Even with the best intentions towards men, we still might have habits that make us frog farmers. This story gently help us become aware of these habits and provides us with understanding and alternative practices.

Here is a book written for women about men. I picked it up being a man to see what it would say I am amazed at how well this lady understands how men work. As is noted, all men will not behave like this of course, but as a general rule, when we understand each other we are all so much better off! I speak not only to women to understand the males, but also we as men need to grasp how women operate Even though it was not the focus, I learned a lot about women. The writer clarifies that we all have both feminine and masculine qualities. We both can be strong in one or the other characteristics and even drift back and forth between them That is all good and fine. Just understanding the differences and being able to see them is powerful!! It gives me and all who grasp the concept the power to relate to each other in a more meaningful way The writer uses a story line with several chapters to make the reading very interesting. It is not a text book by no means in how the material is shared. It is totally captivating. I allowed myself only 30 minutes before bed to read it. Now that I am done I am a little sad. It was something to look forward to every evening Thank you Alison for this wonderful work of art that you have created for us all.

I loved the context, mix between learning and following a story. I've stated to recomend it my friends that believe in the same as the book. It is a 5 star book, deseres a 5 stars.

It's nicely narrated and a very good read for anyone who wants to get to know men better or at least, communicate and co-live with them better. I am sure that there are exceptions to many men, but it is certainly helpful for any woman who cannot understand why her communication with another man is staggering.